Well now. Hello there. What a breath of fresh air you are. Next to me as I type is a three month old baby who put himself to sleep, which is indicative of where we are in the transition to family-of-five-ness: still in the thick of it, but starting to feel normal again.
I pressed pause on writing here for the last few months so that I could 1) physically and emotionally recover after birth 2) rearrange the way I manage my writing work so that it’s more sustainable. I’m happy to report that both of those things are going as well if not better than I’d anticipated, and I’m reappearing in your inbox fresh-faced (figuratively, as yesterday’s mascara is flaked all over my cheeks) and raring to go.
If you subscribed to this newsletter while it was on pause, God bless you, and welcome. This is the slightly longer, more structured arm called The Paradox Paper. You’ll see it once a month. The shorter, sillier thread mostly made up of funny Tweets is called The Good Nonsense, and she’ll make an appearance a few times a month, give or take. She’s loosey-goosey.
Whether this is the first time you’re reading my words here, or you’re my wonderful uncle who’s read every version and edition of this newsletter “even though he’s not the target audience,” I need you to know that I’m smiling as I type. I’m so grateful for you, and so thrilled to be back.
Welcome to The Paradox Paper, a monthly newsletter that honors paradox in the every day. If a friend forwarded you this email, click here to subscribe:
In this edition:
Three books I’ve enjoyed
The pain of limited parenting
A snippet about cynicism
Links to the latest podcast episodes and some exciting news
A prayer to help us see the good things
Books
Heads In Beds, Jacob Tomsky
I love a juicy behind-the-scenes look at almost any industry, but the world of luxury hotels was more interesting than I imagined. Icing on the cake, this is set in New Orleans, where I used to live, and New York, one of my favorite places to read about. If you like books with a strong sense of place, authors with a distinct (and hilarious) style, and you’re not a germaphobe, you’ll enjoy this! If profanity is a no-go for you, you’ll want to skip this one.
Good Apple: Tales of a Southern Evangelical In New York, Elizabeth Passarella
I’m willing to bet that no matter who you are—Christian, atheist, married, single, city-dweller, small-town-lover, Republican or Democrat—you’ll find something to relate to and laugh about in this book. If you’re navigating the inevitable and awkward process of disappointing people you care about, you’re the one being disappointed, or you’ve ever accidentally left your young children home alone, you’ll enjoy this. No content warnings necessary.
Delighting In The Trinity: An Introduction To The Christian Faith, Matthew Reeves
Our pastor is in the middle of a sermon series on the Trinity and mentioned this book. I don’t do a lot of theological reading at this stage of my life, but he promised it was short and practical, so I ordered it. The doctrine of the Trinity is something I’ve always believed, but it’s never made it on the list of “faith things that impact my day to day life and deserve extra attention.” Wow. I’ve been missing out. If your faith could use a refresh, or you’re simply curious about Christianity, I cannot recommend this more highly.
My youngest son has been seeing a chiropractor every week for the last month, because he settled into a weird position in my womb and was born with the world’s most annoying crick in his neck.
My middle son, almost three, has a tongue tie that we didn’t know about until a month ago. Since we didn’t know about the tongue tie, we also didn’t know about the problems an unresolved tongue tie can cause—trouble latching for breastfed babies, sleeplessness, TMJ, emotional difficulties—all things he has struggled with since infancy. It’s starting to look like the child we’ve always thought of as “spirited” might have just been hurting and exhausted his entire life.
My oldest is starting Pre-K in August. He will wear a uniform and and eat in a cafeteria and, once a week for half an hour, he’ll meet with a lovely speech therapist named Ms. Boudreaux.
The crooked neck is slowly but surely straightening out. The tongue tie is getting released next month. The speech therapist is kind and encouraging.
I am feeling the obvious and heartbreaking reality that I will never be enough for my children. For trained professionals, for other moms whose stories illuminate a light bulb in my brain, and for the ever-renewing grace of God that fills in all my gaps—I’m grateful. And wow, it’s hard hitting my limits.
A Snippet
The word “cynicism” keeps floating around my brain, sour and hollow. I think it’s what we’re left with when we “abhor what is evil,” and forget to “cling to what is good.” (Romans 12:9)
To call evil by it’s name and shrink back from it is the right move, but where do we shrink back to? Our lips must be naming the good things until our minds believe them; our hands, our lungs, our legs, must be clenched around the goodness of our God until we grow that way.
Evil will make itself evident sooner or later, from within or without, and our minds are liable to let it crowd out all other realities. When that happens, may our bodies fall into the muscle memory of clinging to all that Goodness calls good.
The Small Group Show
The podcast has kept running during the newsletter’s pause! We’ve passed ten episodes and one thousand downloads. I’m not really a numbers person, but these numbers mean that God is meeting needs, and He’s allowing our little show to be part of that.
One other piece of happy news! We’ve had a couple of guests! The guest episodes we’ve done so far have turned out to be some of my very favorite. Our most recent episode with Meg Smith is out now, and our next guest episode will drop July 1st.
Thank you for listening, sharing episodes with your friends and family, and taking the time to share with us how the show has impacted you. I’m shocked and delighted, because y’all, all things considered, we’re pretty bad podcasters.
Here are the episodes that have come out since I was last in your inbox:
It is a true joy to write for you each month, and I always love to hear about shows that you watched, products you tried, and anything that stirred your heart. Simply reply to this email or leave a comment to let me know.
Until next time, hold the paradox and don’t panic. Love you.
-Steph
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