The Paradox Paper #44
My favorite question
Well we did it. We hauled 60+ youths to teen camp, hosted out-of-town family, shepherded the middle child through surgery, and danced our way through VBS. Could we have wrung any extra juice out of July? Maybe, but I don’t know how. These were some of the best times:
This year our pastor happened to be our camp speaker. One of our favorites speaking life over a gazillion of his favorites. The sweetest.
I mean, look at them! Who gave them the right? How lucky are we? That’s what I wanna know.
The cousins came for a visit and no children have ever been happier about anything.
It turns out that childhood tonsillectomy recovery, while shorter than its adult counterpart, still sucks big hair donkey balls. Except for when Your Favorite Neighbor has warm cookies and Blue Bell delivered. That part is okay.
Some of us were a little sore and most of us were a little tired, but all of us love VBS.
Welcome to The Paradox Paper, a monthly newsletter that honors the paradox in a life with Jesus. If a friend forwarded you this email, click here to subscribe:
In this edition:
A YouTube playlist for when you want something light and short
A book for when you want to get better at meaningful conversation
A top ten favorite question
A prayer in the form of a song I’ve probably played 100 times.
GMM’s Mystery Countdown Theater
Since we’ve lived six lifetimes this month, we haven’t wanted to do much more than go straight to sleep ourselves after tucking the kids into bed. Since that feels a little sad (their “staying up late” summer bedtime is 8pm, after all) we’ve taken to watching one of these twenty minute episodes instead. Each one features several clips played in reverse, with Rhett and Link attempting to guess the featured item before the clock runs out. The theme varies—objects being smashed with a sledgehammer or molten glass being poured over various objects, for instance—but the game is always close and we have fun guessing along. It’s an easy way to share some fun together at the end of a long day. And by the end it’s 8:30pm! A totally respectable grown-adult bedtime!
How To Know A Person by David Brooks
When it comes to deep relationships—the kind where intimate understanding is shared and both parties see and feel seen—David Brooks is no natural. He argues that none of us are. That’s why he wrote a book about it. Making the case that “seeing others deeply and being deeply seen” is a skill that can be learned, he lays out several ways to practice it. I found the section on asking the right questions so helpful I purchased the book just for that!
I don’t know where it came from. It did not originate with me and Trevor. When we began serving in our church’s student ministry, it was already there. Running through every camp and retreat and mission trip. Popping up during small group time. Thrown out casually over Sunday morning doughnuts. Echoed back again above the noise of Wednesday night pick-up basketball. This question:
Where did you see God today?
Simple. Unassuming. Zero theological training required in the asking or the answering. Personal and immediate. It doesn’t ask how God has appeared to humanity at large over millennia, how He showed up for your family five years ago, or what you hope He’ll do for you next week. No no, just you. Just today. Where did you notice Him? What was He up to?
And yet, even as the question itself is phrased for the individual—where did you see God—the ask and the answer is communal. This exercise can’t be done alone. One asks, the other answers, and together we bear witness to the presence and love of our good God.
Without this question—or practices in line with it—our faith grows weak. In this world groaning under the weight of sin, the question of whether heartbreak will ever outstrip our faith is not if, but when. When circumstances leave us crushed, with the ever-sturdier suspicion that God is not good, does not love us, we are alone and have been horribly mistaken, what then? When the last of our faith has shriveled up and blown away, what could possibly make it grow again?
John the Baptist, who was in prison, heard about all the things the Messiah was doing. So he sent his disciples to ask Jesus, “Are you the Messiah we’ve been expecting, or should we keep looking for someone else?”
Jesus told them, “Go back to John and tell him what you have heard and seen—the blind see, the lame walk, those with leprosy are cured, the deaf hear, the dead are raised to life, and the Good News is being preached to the poor.”
— Matthew 11:2-5 NLT
John, whose entire life (literally, from the womb) had been centered on declaring Jesus of Nazareth the Messiah, found Roman prison a difficult place to keep the faith. He was so troubled he sent his disciples to ask Jesus point blank: are you really the guy, or have I been a fool all this time?
Jesus’ answer is not one of offense. He doesn’t condemn. Nor is it one of placation. He doesn’t miraculously spring John out of prison (on the contrary, John is executed a mere three chapters later.) Jesus doesn’t address John directly at all. Rather he sends the Baptizer’s followers back to him with instructions to “tell him what you have heard and seen.” They went back to lend faith to their rabbi, whom suffering had rendered faithless. To bear witness. It’s almost like Jesus knows stories are the best conduits of hope. We have seen God today.
That’s why I love this question so much. Asking it allows me to hear the stories of God’s good work in the world, even when my circumstances darken my vision. Like a transfusion, another’s faith can breathe new life into mine. Conversely, knowing that someone else will eventually turn the question on me focuses my attention, and I find God present in the mundane moments of my day where I’d otherwise overlook Him.
If, like me, weariness and cynicism creep up on you quick, maybe you need this question. Tell somebody what you’ve heard and seen, and then ask them:
Where did you see God today?
It is not an exaggeration to say that I’ve listened to this song over one hundred times since hearing it for the first time a few weeks ago. Every time I listen I ask the Spirit to make it true of me. You can borrow that prayer if you want.
It is a true joy to write for you each month, and I always love to hear about anything you tried and loved or anything that stirred your heart. Simply reply to this email or leave a comment to let me know.
Until next time, hold the paradox, don’t panic. Love you.
-Steph
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P. S. - In 2007 our church founded an orphanage outside of Opi, Nigeria, and this October I have the opportunity to visit there for the first time! I wrote more about the orphanage and the trip here.
If you’d like to help offset the cost, you can do so at this link.
Enter the amount you would like to give and choose “Mission APOHA 2024” from the drop down menu. If you would like to give by check, make payable to Temple Baptist Church with “Stephanie Cochrane Nigeria” in the memo line.