Hello hello! So thrilled to be with you again. I’ve chipped away at this edition over the course of this whole week. Usually I procrastinate and I’m still workingright down to the wire, but I was forced to start earlier this time because of Covid.
My youngest tested positive last week, and that would’ve been sad enough, but our church was also running VBS. His sickness meant that I would be home caring for/isolating with him and wouldn’t be able to volunteer as I’d planned.
Mercifully, no one else in the family got it and our older children were still able to attend, but I felt the loss all week long. That I grieved not being part of VBS is important, because I have always hated VBS. I never enjoyed the ones I attended as a child, and have dreaded them as an adult in ministry.
Last summer a friend asked me—in curiosity, not condemnation—why I hadn’t signed up to help with VBS. I explained my distaste. She gently suggested I come as the photographer. I could stay in the background and interact mostly with adults. “I’d hate for you to miss out,” she said. “Everyone really comes together for the kids.” I agreed.
My friend was right. VBS at our church is an unmissable week—not because of the size or the program or the budget, but because of the way the whole church comes together in a joint effort to help the families of our community experience the love of Jesus. Last summer I was an anti-VBS skeptic. This summer I am heartbroken that sickness kept me from being a part.
I don’t tell you this story to get you to care about VBS. I share this with you because it’s important that you know something: what your experience has always been is not indicative of the way it will always be. Jesus is not bound by your past, your wounds, your doubts, or your skepticism. He has more for us than the way it’s always been. He is out for our joy.
This concludes the sermon portion, (somebody tell the new folks this isn’t normal) so let’s get into it.
Welcome to The Paradox Paper, a monthly newsletter that honors paradox in the every day. If a friend forwarded you this email, click here to subscribe:
In this edition:
A romcom that will actually make you laugh instead of scream, “JUST HAVE A CONVERSATION ALREADY,” every five sentences.
A thriller that will keep you guessing without keeping you up at night.
A delightful movie you’ve probably seen
The stretch and frenzy of the in between
A book that will help you read Scripture with fresh eyes
A link to my favorite books of the year
A prayer to help us rest when life is rushing
Part of Your World, Abbey Jimenez
Is this book going to change your life? No, but it’ll be fun. Alexis is a wealthy ER doctor who’s sworn off men forever. Daniel is an inn keeper in a tiny Minnesota town. They fall in love. The bones are predictable. But Abbey Jimenez doesn’t leave us there. Nope, she helps us recognize the many shapes domestic abuse can take, the importance of healthy friendship, the value of community, and the right time to break family ties. I listened to the audio version and thoroughly enjoyed it. Beware of some open door scenes.
The Golden Couple, Greer Hendricks and Sarah Pekkanen
Thriller is a tricky genre for me. They’re either too scary or too predictable. This is neither one. Marissa and Matthew go to Avery for marriage counseling after Marissa’s infidelity. They’re sure Avery’s controversial therapy methods can save their marriage, until Marissa’s disgruntled lover proves unwilling to let her go. This was also a really enjoyable audio experience.
When Harry Met Sally
Somehow a young, impressionable Steph heard about the famous restaurant scene in this film and wrote it off as forever unwatchable. I stumbled across it on a sleepy Sunday afternoon this month and I was immediately delighted. So much so that I stopped half way through so that I could start over with Trevor. We laughed and laughed. I’m glad baby Steph never saw it. She would’ve been confused and unappreciative (and, in case there was any confusion, it is not a film for children.) Grown Steph was thoroughly entertained and endeared by this story of how our ideas of romance and friendship change and soften with time.
A few weeks ago something happened at our apartment complex that made us afraid for our safety. We’re all okay and it hasn’t continued, but it was a wake up call. We’d been planning to start the home search in Spring or Summer 2023, but this incident has accelerated that timeline.
It’s a little exciting, a lot annoying. I’m looking for a part time job to grow our nest egg faster, we’re hauling our kids all around the city on our free evenings, we’re having those extra-zenful “who-cares-about-the-backyard-the-kitchen-sucks-I-have-a-headache” conversations. It feels a little like being in a full-stop traffic jam when you’re already late? Or waiting on a passport when you’ve already bought tickets? Or the last month of pregnancy?
Every next step that we’re responsible for taking requires waiting on someone else to to do their part. We need a pre-approval before we can make any offers. I need a job before we get a pre-approval. The four jobs I’ve pursued have to go through their own specific process of consideration (which involves talking to multiple people who also have processes) before they’ll get back to me. When I get hired I’ll have to wait for my kids to go back to school before I can start. Then it’ll be waiting for the pre-approval. Then house-shopping begins in earnest. When we find something we like it’ll start the waiting cycle for all the tiny steps of that process. Earnest deposit. Inspections. Quotes. Appraisals. Negotiation. Closing.
Urgency and carefulness.
Diligence and rest.
Creativity and rules.
IT’S THE EVER LOVING PARADOX OF IT ALL, FOLKS. Waiting and rushing and waiting and more waiting, and I don’t want to do any of it. And it’s hot outside.
The Blue Parakeet, Scot McKnight
If you’ve ever had a conversation with a fellow Christian that left you wondering, “How are we reading the same Bible?” you’ll enjoy this book. We all like to believe we’re reading the Bible just as it is. We condemn those who disagree with us with words like, “They don’t really respect Scripture, they just pick and choose.” Scot kindly and generously shows how we ALL pick and choose, (when was the last time you washed your guest’s feet?) and posits that perhaps that’s not a bad thing. I finished this book with not only greater understanding of and confidence in my approach to Scripture, but deeper compassion for those who approach it differently. While it’s still accessible to the lay-Christian, this is a bit more academic than my usual fair and I found it easier to move through in audio format. The narrator has an almost cheerful demeanor that kept me engaged in spots that I might otherwise have zoned out.
Best Books of the Year
The book recs I share in this newsletter are as close as I get to public reviews. As a writer myself it feels too tender to tell the whole internet the gritty truth of how a book affected me. But I don’t mind sharing with a few close friends 😏 My favorite books of the year (and a few of my least favorite) are up in The Paradox Community. The kind folks there pay a one-coffee-a-month subscription fee and receive any extra writing I do—like poems, thoughts on controversial issues, and family stuff. Most of my writing is not for profit so that extra support means so much to our family. If you’d like to subscribe, tap the button below.
It is a true joy to write for you each month, and I always love to hear about anything you tried and loved or anything that resonated with you. Simply reply to this email or leave a comment to let me know.
Until next time, hold the paradox, don’t panic. Love you.
-Steph
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