Welcome to The Paradox Paper, where we work together to live in paradox without panic.
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Hi buddy.
Welcome to November. It's a big month, eh? So many activities! No Shave November, NaNoWriMo, Thanksgiving, Black Friday, and on this very Tuesday, BUT TWO DAYS HENCE is... my mother's birthday. HAPPY BIRTHDAY MOM!!!
And... that's it, right? Nothing much else happens this month. Certainly not this week. Just your average quiet week in the year of our Lord 2020.
Ted Lasso
Listen. What you need is a laugh. A good, deep, honest laugh free of cynicism. There’s a day for dark entertainment with twisty plots and dysfunctional characters. IT IS NOT THIS DAY.
Today we need redemption, perseverance, compassion, radical forgiveness, and—FOR THE LOVE—copious amounts of the ability to laugh at ourselves. We need entertainment that reminds us of these necessities.
Ted Lasso is that show. An American football coach is hired to coach a premiere soccer league in the UK. He knows as much about soccer as I do (zero things), every other character is against him in the beginning, and he keeps a sense of humor and remains kind. Like, brings-the-horrible-boss-cookies-every-morning kind. It is the first show since The Office and Parks And Rec that I’ve wanted to immediately rewatch after the final episode.
One content warning—Brittish soccer players don't hold back on the cusses. And one small con—it’s on AppleTV+. BUT a week’s free trial is plenty of time to watch the whole thing. Just ten thirty-minute episodes, hallelujah.
Olive and June
If my nails look good it makes me feel like a real person, even when I've been wearing the same clothes for three days and haven't showered. I did at-home gel polish for years, but the time commitment and the everything-must-be-perfect-or-this-will-peel-in-five-seconds-ness of it was getting real old. Not to mention how quickly the NOT CHEAP polish got clumpy in the bottle.
Earlier this year I noticed Olive and June floating around on the ol' Insta feed. People—stay at home moms with little kids, no less—were saying how long-lasting the polish was. I was skeptical, but decided to take the plunge and order a mani set for my birthday in September.
LIS-TEN. It is gooooood. Fabulous colors, affordable bottles, practical tools, and it lasts me an entire week of dish-scrubbing and butt-wiping before I get my first chip. If you're someone who paints your nails, you'll love it. If you're not, well Christmas is coming pal.
If you want to try it out, here's a handy code for $10 off your first order.
The holiday season is about to ramp up. Under normal circumstances, this time of year can be lovely and magical, but also weird. Even in the best of years things can get hairy quick juggling family dynamics, finances, travel, schedules, and extra events.
But what about when you're grieving? Or when a global pandemic has turned “holiday traditions” upside down? Well, that’s a whole ‘nother thing.
In about five minutes we'll all be buried in gift guides from Every Internet Person we know. I love a good gift guide. Yes, please, tell me how to manage all the gifts for all the people. But this year we have a lot more than gifts to manage. We need to know what to do with all this loss and heartache. We need help managing our grief.
So I created The Holiday Grief Guide—a short ebook that examines ways we can honor grief and celebration at the same time.
If you’re missing a loved one, weary from the weight of the past year, or simply feeling overwhelmed trying to manage all of the emotions attached to the season, The Holiday Grief Guide is for you.*
It's available today, and you can use code 2020HOLIDAYS to save an extra 15%.
*It's been a rough year. I would never want finances to keep you or someone you care about from being able to access this resource. If you want the guide but can't afford it right now, please send me an email and we'll get it to you.
Forty days ago, give or take, I started reading Psalm 37. It's been a favorite for years, but this time it hit fresh in the face of such a tumultuous election season. I was so struck by it I wanted to share with the good Instagram friends. I thought to myself, "Hey, forty days till election, forty verses in the Psalm! I can do the whole thing!"
It turns out I still have small children who want to eat three times a day and I read Scripture at about five words per minute, so cover the entire Psalm we did not. I hope you still read it and find courage, and check out the existing videos!
Okedoke, time for some Q's from the InstaFolk!
Just one question this month...
@keeshalil asks, "Which do you prefer in a pastor—deeply theological or loving shepherd?"
Well. This could shoot off in any number of directions. We could talk about the fact that a deep understanding of theology grounded in Christ should lead all of us to shepherd and care for one another well. Or that the desire to nurture each other's souls should lead us to a diligent study of Scripture. But we won't do that because you didn't ask me which one I think is more right or more important. You just asked which I prefer.
Having had pastors that were more one than the other, pastors who were neither, and pastors who were both, both is preferred 😆 But since you're making me choose, I think I'd pick a shepherding heart over a deeply theological mind.
It's a hard choice, because I love to dive in the deep end with someone theologically, but that is something that I'm able to do on my own. I can read books, listen to podcasts, or follow deep thinkers on the internet. But books can't notice when I'm depressed. Podcasts hosts can't possibly know I'm sick in bed. Twitter can't help me plan a funeral. Only the people in my actual life can do that stuff, and I need em to do it well.
God of naming:
Let us know Your name.
Let us know You as You are—
not just as You have been portrayed,
not only as we imagine You to be.
Strip away all false imaginings.
Let us see clearly,
and recognize You as our own.
It's a true joy to write for you each month, and I always love to hear about any products you tried, shows you watched, or any ways that your heart was stirred. Simply reply to this email to let me know.
Until next month, embrace the paradox and don't panic. Love you bye.